Idiot(s) of the Week

I can't decide whether or not these guys are idiots or geniuses. Let's think this through.

One guy gets so freakin' fat that he avoids lethal injection. Here, we've had lawyers and activist groups for decades trying to find loopholes in the system, and lo and behold, this whole time all you had to do was eat yourself into Gilbert Grape mode. What I can't believe is that this is a problem. I mean, what are these people afraid of? Why not just give him a bunch of shots at once? It's not like they can be worried about the guy overdosing on lethal injection drugs!

Idiocy: As funny as this story is, he raped two women. If they can't find a vein, find a firing squad. 5 points

Style: Everybody knows that this guy was doing what everyone else would do. Who in their right mind is going to watch their weight when they know they're going to be pumped full of juice? 2 points

Total: 7 out of 10

Then there's this shining star. A paraplegic who manages to escape the fuzz while awaiting trial. Here, I sit at home every Saturday night and watch COPS, where guys in motorcycles and souped-up 1988 Trans-Ams try every trick in the book to get away from the 5-0 and always get the crap beat out of them. But this guy - who is paralyzed - just "rolls away." Sly dog.

Idiocy: Sheer genius. I give him low marks here. 2 points

Style: Anyone who manages to make a wheelchair look good enough to roll right out of the court house has to be doing something right. 5 points

Total: 7 out of 10